Thursday, August 30, 2007

Family Ties

I've learned -

that your family won't always
be there for you. It may seem funny,
but people you aren't related to
can take care of you and love you
and teach you to trust people again.

Families aren't biological.

I read this somewhere many years ago. I have lived away from home for so many years that I have lived this truth. I have had my share of ups and downs, of tears and laughter, of friends and foes, of wonderful love and tearful heartbreaks.

What do you call this family that you acquire over the years? Do you have to give it a name? VJ: My dearest friend, my next door neighbour at one time, and I were thick as thieves. Still are. Born exactly 364 days after I came into this world, it seemed so special to have found a friend in him. That our birthdays had to be so close... right next door... just like us made the friendship even more special.

I moved out of Hyderabad 2 years ago and among the people I missed, he was the one I missed the most. There's something about having a great friend as a neighbour. Making friends with your neighbour is very different from having your friend become your neighbour.

We'd visited each other several times and my trip to Singapore was thanks to him and him alone. We would talk late into the night about life, work, love and everything else in between. There was no way I could give this relationship a name. I still cannot. I tell people "we're family" and people ask, "is he like your brother?" No, he's not like my brother. But he's family. How do I explain that?

He's the guy whose shoulder I cried on when I had the worst nightmares of my life. When I had repeated visions of the one night in which I lost my handbag and the love of my life, he gave me the strength to carry on. When I left Hyderabad, we'd spent months debating that decision. We could rely on each other to look at something in a very objective fashion. And as recent events proved, we still can.

I am just back from his wedding. He tied the knot 346 days after I did. And just as he came to my wedding and was part of my big day, I was happy I could be a part of his. I'd not have missed this for anything but the recent incidents made me a little unsure of being able to make it. I tried and I was there. I had a lovely time. I was family. Not a friend, not a sister... but family.

VJ: I wish you and Sangeetha the very best that life has to offer. I can never be too thankful to have you in my life.


Revathi said...

I think so too, Families need not be biological. I will blog on this too.

Raaga said...

I know Revathi... will wait for your post.

Damitra said...

now, i am positive we are living in parallel universes :)

Raaga said...

@Damitra: Wow... why so? Why more convinced now than before?

Damitra said...

Wedding in the family at the same time, HR profession, Holidays at the same time, similar rock climbing experiences and now best friends who were neighbhours first!! need i say more ? :)

smilie said...

nice post:)
sometimes our friends are also the ones who are with us all times.Though we live miles apart the friendliness does not fade away.

Pretty Woman said...

how was chennai trip? my update is on the post...i hope i have not missed ur anniversary (its sept 18th, right?)

Aaarti said...


Nice.. u wrote abt the wedding too.. i have written something on my blog
as well di... :)

was sure fun travelling with u n spending all that wonderful time...

looking fwd to meeting up soon~~