Loss

Sometimes you know someone for years and then realize you know nothing about them. At others, you know almost nothing and in one meeting you feel like you’ve known someone for years. How do you feel when someone you’ve met just once touches your life in a way you never thought possible? How do you feel when the lingering memory of that one meeting makes you want to go back and have a second interaction? How do you feel when you realize it is too late now and the second interaction can never happen? A bit cheated perhaps, angry maybe? A mix of both, maybe? I don’t know really.

I can only pray that his soul rest in peace.

Time flies

I started blogging because there was a lot of peer pressure. A lot of my very close friends had blogs and almost everyone thought I'd do a decent job of penning my thoughts. It has been a fantastic journey so far. I wrote about absolutely random stuff. From movies to politics to heartbreak and finally, love. There are still times when I desperately want to blog about something, but when I sit down to type, I forget all that I wanted to share with the world.

Somewhere along the way, I started a food blog. I didn't think it would even be one tenth as successful as it has become. I only meant for it to be a repository of the many recipes I've discovered or invented over the years. Instead it turned out to be so much more.

I still have random thoughts that strike faster than I can imagine. I resolved to keep this blog going this year and I am pretty sure nothing will change that. And I will continue to sing, cook and share the music in my life with all of you. It feels like it was only yesterday that I began this journey. So much has changed since I set out on this path, yet so much remains as it is.

Happy Birthday OnlineRaga!

Pride and Prejudice

I find that good English is getting more endangered with each passing day. As a recruiter, I feel the pain that this causes. I can't hire someone whose language skills are bad and that person doesn't get a chance to work with a company like ours. But what I see around me pains me more. There are companies that are willing to compromise on quality while hiring.

I tried to order flowers at Indiatimes.com and their site said that I'd have to place my order before 2 p.m. if I wanted a same day delivery. Although I'd taken care of that, the flowers didn't get delivered on time. (They refunded my money eventually, but that's a different story!) I tried to call their customer service centre to lodge a complaint and went through their IVRS. The usual rubbish: For English, please press 1. हिन्दी के लिए कृपया २ दबाएँ! I pressed 1 and got to this joker at the other end. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: Hi, I'd like to cancel order no. xxxx. It was supposed to be delivered this evening, but it didn't happen.

He: Sorry ma'm. Your order no. xxxx is placed and will be delivered in 48 hours.

Me: But I wanted same day delivery.

He: The site is no provide guarantee.

Me: It said on the site that if I placed my order before 2 p.m. the delivery would be the same day.

He: We do not gives guarantee. Shipping in 48 hours. I can't able to cancel.

Me (exasperated): I need to speak with someone who can understand English please. Could you please transfer me to someone who knows English?

He (obviously miffed): I speak English Ma'm.

Me (having completely lost it): No, you think you do, but you really don't. I have no time to waste and would like to speak to someone in English.

He: It is not so great language. I speak.

Me: देखिये आप सोचते हैं की आप अंग्रेज़ी जानते हैं। क्या मैं आपके मेनेजर से बात कर सकती हूँ?

He: आपको हिन्दी आती है, हमसे बात कीजिये।

I was so irritated at the end of this. If I'd wanted to have a conversation in Hindi, I'd have dialled 2 to start with. But I doubt if they really care. I sometimes feel I may be the only one who's even bothered about any of this.

On a separate note, there's another advertisement on TV for Virgin mobile where a "Mahalingam" calls in response to an ad in the paper. When will it end?

Stereotypes are here to stay

Stereotypes are here to stay. Or so it seems to me from the ads on radio and TV. These two ads stand out. I am sure there are more.

Stereotype #1:

Ad on TV shows a man coming into the office and trying many things to get his PC on. The man is obviously a “South Indian” shown with vibhuti on his forehead. No details spared. Then a “smart” lady appears, who is noticeably not “South Indian”, and she indicates to the man that the computer is not plugged in.

Product: Some tax saving product from Birla Sun Life.

Stereotype #2:

Ad on radio that talks about how a Mr. So-and-so sent his son abroad for studies and got his daughter married with a lot of pomp and show and yet, and even though he is retired, he relies on no one financially.

Product: IDBI Suvidha fixed deposit.

In 2008, we still resort to portraying the south Indian as dumb. In 2008, we still talk of educating our sons and marrying off our daughters. What can I possibly say?

Star Light Star Bright

Clearly, Indian movies are moving in the right direction: Forward. Taare Zameen Par stands testimony to this fact.



Movies that are takes on Bollywood, that are larger than life, that don't make sense: we've seen them all this year. The best was, indeed, saved for the very last.This was the very first time in all my life that I watched a movie on the very first day of its release. It is probably a regular affair for most people, but I have never been able to do this before. I went in with very high expectations knowing that Aamir Khan wouldn't let me down.

The movie is about how parents and teachers deal with dyslexia. Taare Zameen Par's appeal lies in the "real"ness of it all. There is nothing in the movie that I couldn't relate to. Funny in parts, serious at others, but touching for the entire duration. This is not a funny, feel good movie, but one that makes you think.

Being the daughter of not one, but two, teachers, I have always considered myself very close to the education system in India. My mother taught children who were starting the process (kindergarten) and my father taught those who were completing it (undergrad, grad, doctoral and post doc students). Through my mother, I have known enough and more children who confuse their "b"s and their "d"s, their "p"s and their "q"s. I have seen the parents of these children deal with what was until then unknown to them: dyslexia. I've seen teachers who didn't understand what this was all about and recommending admitting the child to an institute for mentally retarded children. And I've seen parents grapple with the mere thought. All this at a time when information was not widely available as it is today.

Maybe I had some background and so thought this film was great. But then again, maybe not. I think anyone who watches this film can relate to it. In its entirety or in parts. I could dissect this film and talk about the glitches and how it could have been made better. But I think the whole is always greater than the sum of the parts. I cried during many scenes and I also noticed many people wiping away tears.

I have had my share of bad experiences at school despite being, for most part, a topper. And I've seen some students get lousy treatment. And many of the children in my school were first generation literates. I can only imagine how traumatic it could have been for them. This film took me back to those days. To a time when my parents threatened to put me in a boarding school if I didn't behave. (God alone knows how much I misbehaved hoping they'd keep their word.) To a time when I wandered the streets after school to reach home two hours after I should have. To a time when my brother and I thought it was a great idea to catch worms in a bottle and name them "Krishna". To a time that should have been the most carefree, yet, in retrospect, seems like the most stressful.

Everyone in the movie has acted so well that it is difficult to move away from the realness of it all. I wonder if there'll be another one that will strike a chord somewhere anytime soon. Great going Aamir. May your tribe increase.

First and Last

I have never been an avid movie watcher. And Indian movies have never made it big on my already tiny "Must Watch" list. I am picky about the movies I watch. And among Indian films, I'd probably watch selected Tamil and Hindi films. At one point, I was watching some Malayalam films as well, but I don't think DD has that "regional movie with subtitles every Sunday" now.

Last Saturday, I had precious little to do apart from bunches of greens that had to be cleaned and put away. Channel surfing brought me to a song and dance sequence that seemed terrible. I was commenting to my husband that the sequence seemed right out of some third rate Telugu movie. We were debating the A.P. connection and ended up watching the entire movie. We made fun of the predictability of the scenes, expressed irritation at the lewd dialogues and "cheap" humour, but we watched the movie to the end. (That's four bunches of fenugreek and spinach in all!) This movie was, as it turned out, Loafer.

We stepped out for lunch and some shopping and then returned home. I told S that I wanted to watch another "pheku" or "time pass" movie. We started surfing and came to a channel where the screen flashed, "A film by David Dhawan". S said, "This is probably as "pheku" as it gets." This movie turned out to be "Raja Babu". We didn't watch it till the end. It would have been impossible for any self respecting human being to watch that movie without squirming. The script was full of innuendos. The plot was so sick. This was the very first Govinda movie that I watched. I couldn't believe what I was watching. The dances were so horrible that I felt they might as well have shown porn.

What were they thinking? Insulting the sensibilities of the public. Such movies give ideas to people if they didn't have them before. And reinforced stuff like "working in the kitchen is a woman's job" etc. This really makes me a little judgmental. Of people who watch David Dhawan's movies. And of Govinda's fans. I agree that I chose to watch these movies. They were not forced upon me. But I was truly appalled at the quality of the films. People call me a snob because I am picky about the films I watch. If these are examples of "movie for the masses", I think I'm better off this way.

I just saw the list of movies that he has directed so far and found that I'd not watched any of his films... except for... wait... want to guess?... Loafer!!!! That made it two David Dhawan movies in one day. I swore on Saturday never to watch a David Dhawan film again in my life. Nothing will ever change that.

Small is Beautiful

I am extremely excited about the Tata Nano. I am unable to contain my excitement. My mother promised to gift me one whenever it is released. But that's not the only reason I am excited.

I have always been worried about the scooter or the motorcycle being the complete family vehicle. This car will change that. OK, the basic model doesn't have an AC... but no motorcycle or scooter that I have seen has one. In the last 24 hours, I have met so many people who feel this car shouldn't be on the roads. That this is the biggest mistake the Tatas are making. That our roads will be congested. That too many people will be able to afford it. Somehow I think the fact that everybody can afford something that would make their lives a little easier and a little safer is a good thing. Not something we should complain about. But maybe people in India think of cars as a luxury. Why, even I did, for a long time. But maybe the people's car will mean that it will cease to be a status symbol. Maybe that's why people are worried.

If you ask me, it is the huge Mercs and BMWs that congest our roads. Not the likes of the Nano. There's no hue and cry about the number of luxury limos that come into the country. Our roads seem to be OK with them. But when there is a small beauty that everyone can afford, it becomes something we are not OK with. I am more convinced that we are either a nation of hypocrites or one of confused souls.

At the end of the day, I feel that most of the criticism for the Nano is because it is a Tata car. When we bought our vehicle last year, there were so many people, including some of our "closest" friends, who asked us if we were planning to start a taxi service. Just because we own an Indica. I have never felt my pride dip even once. I'd much rather drive a Tata Car than any other. I was all set on the Marina as our next car, but now I think I'd love the Nano more.

We plan to go and check the baby out at the Auto Expo. I was least excited until the news of Nano's release came out. Babies take 9 months and mothers and grandmothers do get excited. So, it is normal for my mother and I to feel this way. We shall await our little one.

It is a huge step forward for the car industry, for the Tatas, and for India. It is a bonus that it is as cute as it is. Maybe we can have Nano autos. And maybe more people will make fun of me then for driving around town in it. But I will never be ashamed to be seen in a Tata car a.k.a. a People's car. I hope this car meets with success. I hope for a safer and accident free India. I can only wish Ratan Tata well. What I (and millions like me) dreamt of, he has achieved. I hope that it will replace the two wheeler as India's family vehicle.